In the many years working as a psychotherapist and spiritual counsellor the question of belonging has always features prominently in people’s process of healing and growth. We have a basic, innate need to feel that sense of belonging; asserting that we are indeed not alone.
But when people have experienced neglect, abuse or trauma one of the common conclusion that’s draw from these experiences, is that they are alone and don’t belong. The work of healing is to reconnect that sense of belonging; that the world is indeed a supportive, welcoming place. It’s not easy imprinting a new paradigm. But it is possible.
Bridging Differences Finding Common Ground
This week the fall series of Unlock Pleasure On-line began. We’re a small but interestingly international group – Japan, the US and Canada in attendance. It intrigues me – where will we find the commonalities of pleasure?
I smile at the fact that only a few years ago I scoffed at the potential for connections made on-line. Now that a good portion of my work is done via the net, I’m still surprised how quickly meaningful connections are made and sustained. While technology has its negative impact for sure, the positives are that it can connect us over time zones, cultures and breaks down beliefs about how we connect.
Oh I feel that too!
People connect by being with each other; by both talking and listening, by being open to giving and receiving, by being curious about the other, and open to discover that we are all much more alike than different. The commonalities we see reassure us we’re “normal” - “Oh I feel that too!” The differences can show us new ways of perceiving and acting in our lives. Differences stimulate and inspire us – if we’re willing to let them, versus being threatened by them.
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“I will begin a new relationship with my body” Unlocking Pleasure was an amazing concept, idea to work and play with explore”